a bit of memory.

Hello Blog paradise ! I happened to get away from all the little things and make it here. I know i haven`t updated this space since long time ago, I`m just preoccupied with school and lots of stuffs. It`s been okay so far.

OKAY WHO AM I KIDDING HERE. Life`s been very very busy and stressful as you all know. There has been projects, tests and preparation for presentations and more projects. I can`t wait for the exams (yes, add that to the list too) to be over cos i really really need a BREAK. really.

I didn`t know i sound like a typical grandmother. oh anyways, what`s going on with me? I`m currently staying at my aunt`s house since i have to babysit for my niece till this weekend. God..i`ve been feeling very restless lately cos waking up very early in the morning is my routine nowadays. i`m the babysitter, remember? secondly, bebeh`s been a great company and i swear i love her to bits. And there`s this DRIFTING word going on between the bestie and me. (well, ignore that).

so yea, that`s bout it, i guess. my mind is blocked, really. i can`t recall a few things now. damn.

okay, now back to projects ! :)

forgive and forget? yes? no?

remember in my previous entry i mentioned bout the things i learnt while i was watching anugerah? only now, i realised i learnt more than what i thought. REALLY &it amazed me.

while waiting for the show to start, i learnt not to judge the person by their looks, appearance or whatnots. in other words, NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER. for instance, i had to sit beside a secondary school mat and somehow, the first impression i had was that i will have to watch a boring and typical mat behaviour. BUT..i was wrong. that mat was more like a simple guy despite his look and the way he dresses. he was also very friendly and surprisingly, funny too !

2nd. i learnt that we should NEVER ever take things or the people around us for granted. especially our loved ones. without us realising it, we may have hurt any of them in any way &so, the best but yet the most seldom action we take, is to learn the lesson and apologise. that very moment i watched the scene, i thought of some people whom i`ve hurt unintentionally. i promised myself that i would apologise to them as soon as possible.

&as soon as the show started, i learnt even more things. in fact, i realised a few things too.

i observed the three hosts, the four finalists and also the supporters. i realised even more things which are quite painful for me to accept it. it`s about dream, career and interest. sheesh ! however, i was praying to god hoping that whatever decision i`ve made will be a frutiful one cos i don`t wish to regret my decision.

whoa. i`m quite amazed by how this small silly insignificant show could make me realise a lot of things and at the same time, teach me a few lessons. i`m so grateful !

&now, before i apologise to the few people, i wish to say a few words. my intention to apologise has got nothing to do with being the "indecisive" girl all of u thought i am. i just feel the need to apologise after what i saw. i know explaining the scene won`t make any impact on any of u but it sure did affect me. therefore, from the bottom of my heart, i wish to apologise for all the things i`ve done, the words i`ve said and the attitude i`ve shown which might have hurt u in any way. i wish to start it all over again but i know it`s not possible. so all i ask for is forgiveness and we both forget the past. how does it sounds?

yoursunshine, temasekpoly and makbapak. how? (okeh, i hope u understand the codes cos i can`t think of any name for u to know who u really are. heh)

dance to the music.

I just reached home a few minutes ago. Yes, it`s so unlike me to reach home this late but I accompanied the cousin. He called me while I was on the way home from school and persuaded me to accompany him and after much persuasion, I agreed since I rejected it the last week. tell me how nice i am. lol. Reached home, did some wash up and then met him. It was such a pleasant experience for me and I swear, that place was so chaotic but it was fun meeting new friends, really.

So that was it. I went to watch anugerah for live. Some of you may wonder why I am exaggerating on this but really, I learnt a lot of new things watching it live. trust me.

&Since it has been quite depressing having to face a lot of pressures in different issues, I was glad I chose to stay in Singapore though it will be much exciting with the cousins in Malaysia.
In case some of you didn`t know, the NASS malay gang threw a surprise party for iffah at PASIR RIS on sunday. &so where do I start? From the time we planned or just fast forward to the party itself?

In the morning, around 10: netti and I went over to bebeh’s house to cook. Yes, we did cook okay ! Zur came later after that to help us carry some of the things.

By 130: we headed to downtown to meet the rest while iyliana and bebeh went to fetch iffah who thought she’ll be celebrating her birthday with the two of them only.

2.15: We set up the things and waited for the birthday girl to come.

2.30: We saw the birthday girl being blindfolded and held hands with bebeh who led her the way. When she finally reached our table, she was surprised !! well, duh ~ I swear she was speechless. Then and there, we sang her the birthday song and suddenly, the wind was so strong that the candles couldn`t light up. Spoil la ! but nvr mind.. heh.

Oh, after all that, everyone just indulged the food since we were famished. After which, the birthday girl was given another surprise. We presented her our “online” magazine with a music being played in the background. So we continued taking pictures, playing games and then, I presented her the last surprise of that day, our present as a group. A total makeover for her: skirt, shirt, jelly shoes, watch and earrings. Well, we wanted her to look more like a girl, that’s why.

So then, the rain comes and we headed over to the nearest pondok and waited for the rain to stop. Apparently the rain didn`t stop so we walked over to downtown to wash up and chill at mc café, the usual spot for us at downtown till 9. Lol !

Yeap, it was G-R-E-A-T ! Totally !

the aunties and uncles came to my house for a short meeup yesterday. they realised that i`ve put on some A LOT of weight and could see black rings around my eyes. they made such a big hoo-haa bout that &i had to explain to them that i`m bothered with some things. honestly, i do realise that i`ve been eating a lot. more than usual. &i think that explains the increase in weight. as for the dark circles around the eyes, i don`t know bout that. maybe, because i`ve been having sleepless nights, thinking of that unexpected situation happening yet, again. way deep down, i feel so hurt. i can`t help but think of various ways to solve this problem though i know, it concerns not only me, but the rest too. i thought i need someone who`s willing to lend me a listening ear, a shoulder for me to cry and cry non stop but i doubt i`ll be able to find the exact word to even express what i`m going through right now. seriously, i think none of them will ever understand cos they NEVER EVER will go through this situation, looking at their whole background now. really, i`m NOT KIDDING. okayy, i feel so shitty now. god, help me !!!

p.s: shaz and syasya, i`m fine. ok, bedek ! heh!

First and foremost, I would like to thank NUR HIDAYAH for the offer. It meant a lot to me oke. &also, a big thank you to SITI HAJAR for forwarding me the sms.


Ytd, Hajar and I went over to beach road to fill up the forms and briefed about the things that we need to do.
Our new company is somehow linked to malay heritage center and you wouldn’t wanna know how we reacted to it. :P
We came to the conclusion that we would be stuck with MHC forever. Haha. Lame..


&because of that, as of Tuesday, 12/9/07, I would be very very very busy.
My working hours would be 9am-7pm.
6 days a week.
Due to that, I foresee myself being the most boring person ever coz I won’t be able to go online that often (or at all), hang out with the cousins till wee hours or even watch tv.
How sad is that?
I believe I will be spending too much time at work, breaking fast together with the colleagues and soon after that, I will have to go for solat terawih.
By the time it ends, I will be very tired and just make my way to lala land.
&that will continue as a cycle for a whole of 1 month.
Can you imagine that?


Nonetheless, I really hope I can keep in touch with my cousins and friends esp NURUL FATHIN AIDA cos I know she’ll be missing me a lot. LOL !
So guys, do msg or call me when u guys are free oke.
My job isn’t that much so I hope I can entertain you. Whee.
Oh yea, I feel guilty too oke cos I can’t break fast with my family except during my off days or course.
Enough of that.


So anyway, I’m a very happy kid.
Why?
Cos I made a madeover for my room.
YAY !
I painted the room purple..
Bought some furniture..
Threw away some unwanted displays..
Rearranged my belongings..
&now, it looks more sexy.
Muahaha.
No la, look more neat, presentable and sweet !
Yea, I guess. Gee !
But I love it ! So so much !
Of course, I would also like to thank the bro for agreeing to change rooms with me.
U bet I was happy bcoz his room was bigger than mine.
Haha !


I’ll put up pictures soon oke ! :)
Do tag often while I’m gone for a short while. Heh !


SELAMAT MENJALAN IBADAH PUASA KEPADA SEMUA UMAT ISLAM YG AKAN BERPUASA.
Kepada sesiapa yg planning or memang tkkan pause, biler nak insaf huh?!
Heh heh heh !
Maaf2 cakap je la eh. Ni ckp terbuang. LOL !


Selamat eh semua!
Semoga sihat2 selalu.
Hee..
MUAH MUAH MUAH.


oh my, teringat muahchee(spelling aku hentam).
HAHAHA !


I’m gonna miss u guys !
So u better miss me.
Nyehaha !

thanks for everything.

i had no lesson today..

but in the morning, the lecturer called saying that she wanted to meet me to discuss some things.

i was very sure she wanted to talk bout my results.

so FAST FORWARD..

i went to meet her and we sat in one small meeting room.

the atmosphere was very tensed.

she asked me bout my results and how come it ended as it is &all i did was just answered accordingly.

however, when she mentioned how dissapointed i am in myself and asked how my mother reacted upon knowing bout it..

i was like stammering and and having difficulties to answer her.

suddenly, i felt the tears rolling down my cheeks. fcuk ! I CRIED !! the embarrassing thing was, i cried infront of her !!!

then she decided changed topic and i could feel the atmosphere getting less tense.

&since she was pressing for time, she ended the discussion and told me not to worry as she won`t contact mother to inform bout me.

whee ! thankyou ms lina !

after that, i went back to canteen to meet the guys. BLA BLA BLA & rudy and i was famished so we went to buy food at the western stall.

i was talking to rudy and asking him to pass me the smaller knife and so i said,

"kasik yg kecik nye la, DY !"

but then..

the auntie heard..

"BI !"

hahhahaha.

then she was like..

"aper kau panggil dier? bi?"

rudy and i turned to each other and laughed out real loud..

i think the whole canteen could hear us.

lol. kidding.

then i said, "no laa. ruDY."

hahaha.

"aku tot kau ckp bi..yelaa..budak2 skrg kan bi sini bi saner. dah kahwin trus burok/babi."

HAHAHAHAHA.

gerek uh lu makcik ! aku panggil rudy bi? tk dapat ar !!

&when i reached home, i was surprised that mother talked to me. weird huh.

talked to fad just now. we let out a secret and i was surprised she felt the same way. &trust me, i felt a little bit better telling u that little secret. lol ! i love eu okay. remember that !

&bebeh, thanks for ur concern. i am really really fine now. i just felt better after letting out everything to ms lina. lol ! i love eu too okay ! =))

telepathy

i was logging in to blogger..

wanting to type out everything that has been bothering me..

then i opened a new tab while waiting for the page to load..

then i typed sayang`s link and i was shocked !

i almost fell off from my chair..REALLY

she WROTE the SAME EXACT thing that i wanted to blog bout !

shcoked to the max lah sehh !

then i read on, luckily only the first few paragraph were the same, not the rest.

if not, i`ll start laughing to myself.

okeh i know that paragraph was crap.

anyway, school`s been a bit relaxed cos most of the assignments either are completed or the new topics have not been taught yet. however, some things do still bore me. the complains that we received from various lecturers. apparently, the few lecturers are finding fault with my class and we just don`t know what the reasons are.

can u like believe what the comm skills teacher told my careperson? first of all, she said that my group was very noisy THEN..she added on that i was quiet. seriously, i don`t recall being quiet in class. i participated in most of the activities la seh and i do listen attentively when others are speaking. wtthhheck is wrong with her mannn ! i mean i`ve nothing against her complaining bout me but that`s not true lor ! then, there`s another complaint bout the term test and lecturers meeting.

let`s not talk bout it.

anyway, we had an early lecture today followed by another tutorial. then, it was break till 3. that means 5 hours of break. &since we didn`t know what to do, we went to library to play monopoly. hahaa ! it was so so fun. really, tk bedek ! lol !

suddenly i have lots of things to be done. got to go now ! =))

as much as i convince myself that it`s nothing big..

i just can`t help wondering over and over again..

oh god..pls help me get out of this..

i`m sick and tired of it..

i cannot believe i am still here, waiting.

will someone save me from here?

anyone..

a good friend?

best friend?

enemy?

i`m not that choosy.

that`s what cousins are for.

on SATURDAY (the day nizam nampak aku tapi tknk tegur pasal mepek nye reason), went for karaoke with the cousins and uncle and auntie. i was never (!!!) late for more than an hour but last saturday was an exception. i woke up very early cos i had to do the housework and for the obvious reason, i didn`t want to be late. apparently, my eyes jadik kero so i mistook the time. was supposed to meet boboy at 330 but i went out of my house at 330. then ! as usual la kan, i know i would get lost at dhoby ghaut station so i made boboy wait for me at the place i`d alighting. he waited for me for more than an hour okehh, so sweet cann !

headed to chinatown and both of us were like laughing to each other. we looked like some indian lost in some alienated chinese place (no offence ehh). reached cash karaoke studio and was forced to sing. aku belum lagik warm up sehh. hahah. (step warm up. pikir penyanyi kepe mizahh ! lol. ) on top of that, was forced to dance too ! omg, so the memalukan la seh. sang sang sang. danced danced danced. ate ate ate. laughed laughed laughed. then time was up.

so we made our way out. sat at the centre where all the shops were closed. funny sia. imagine going to a shopping centre (maybe not), maybe a complex to find that all the shops are closed except for the karaoke studios.

yes, that`s 1/4 of my cousins. the rest were busy working or doing projects so they couldn`t make it.

look closely and u`ll see that the primary 5 cousin is of the same height as me when she tiptoes.

after that, walked all the way from chinatown to esplanade then to lau pa sat (or what the uncle call it as lau sa pat) where the uncle treated us to a whole lot stretch of food on the table. thankyou !

okeh, we were jumping into each other but u can`t see it here cos the auntie forgot to click. lol !

after which, the uncle and auntie went off while we went to the other uncle`s house to borrow his car. so we washed up a little to make ourselves more fresh and went out to the different places. played games, ate, laughed and ran away from the TP. haha. reached home close to 5 and slept after subuh. only to wake up at 8 to work for the whole of two shifts with shaz.

done ! off to meet sayang after a week of not meeting. =))