What`s there for new year?

New year resolution:
1. Do more jogging.
2. Learn how to cook (i bet bebeh and sayang are laughing their lungs out. maybe everyone too)
3. Grow taller, maybe?
4. Be more confident of myself.
5. Learn to appreciate myself.
6. Be more close to bebeh, mat c0ol, sayang and the rest.
7. Discuss with mother and maybe, the family, bout their attention towards me.
8. Spend more time alone.
Well, that`s bout it. There`s still a few but let that be only me to know.

Since today is the last day of the year, i shall reflect on what have happened.
..... ..... ..... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... ...... ..... ...... ..... ....... ..........
First, i started of the year pretty bad due to some personal and family problems. Then, i also started a new journey of my school life, that is in polytechnic. The friends were all so nice, frenly and etc but after some time, some of them started to show their true colours. From there, i learnt that as grow older, i will need to face a lot of different people whom some i may trust and some, whom i have to avoid getting involved with.

That brings me to another topic which is quite common. I met a lot of new people mainly; mat siput babi, shabir, fauzie, fadiah, shaz, hardi, ryn, nizam and some other whom i can`t think of right now. Hah!

Then and again, i had to face another big shocking thing in my life. It`s a big thing that i find it very disturbing. Totally depressed by what happened but i just had to show the ones i loved that i`m okay. Although it seems that i`m being a hypocrite, that`s actually the right thing to do. I won`t want the loved ones to even worry bout me.

Besides that, there`s still a lot of other shocking news that i received from a lot of different people and i find them trying to play some drama with me. Shoot!

I think i better stop.

I can`t continue further.

I`m too weak to even type it out.

"Tears are just rolling down the cheeks.. memories are flashed in the mind. Mistakes are just haunting me. "

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILADHA

First of all, happy 17th birthday to khairudy! May god bless eu and good luck in everything that eu do.

Also,
SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILADHA TO ALL MUSLIMS!

No, don`t think i`m crazy for going online just to wish this. I`m working! Yes, working. Very sad, you know. And i`m all dressed up in baju kurung. Hahah.

Auntie kat bwh blk: Aik, dah nak gi jalan raye?

Mizahh: Ahaaha. tk laa. nak gi keje. *shows a very sad face*

See, even the auntie thought i was going for jalan raya. Nyehaha.

Err, oops! A lot of people are coming and i`m damn busy suddenly. Shall post another entry, new year resolution, i guess.

Coming right up, after the break.

LOL.

Chill

Woke up when i received a call from cousin. She told me that no one was coming to take over her shift so i told her to call the guy who was supposed to be there. And then i realised, ahhh, it`s already 2. Dang! I never wake up that late before. I tried to remember the things that happened the day before and i realised that was the reason. I received too much shocking news and was also made to say something which i kept it to only myself for more than a year. Because of that, i had a terrible chest pain which resulted in me consuming any medicines that was available in the kitchen. I also tried calling bebeh and had a short chat with her before going off to bed. Phew!

Today, went off to bebeh`s house since she was so bored and was craving for mcdonald`s double chocs. She cooked for me and acap and the food was masin byk according to acap. LOL. For me, no comments! Then, the three of us watched hindustan movie and after that, headed to downtown for the double chocs. We met sayang there cos i forced her to come down. Heh!

HajarSAYANG and fathinBEBEH

mizahh and hajar

see how hard she tries to be cute..lol!

I just realise..sayang looks like she`s pregnant. Nyehaha. How many months ey?

fathin &acap

I`m ur prince says:
well for me.. i'll love u till theres no more tomorrow

beautiful D I S A S T E R says:
i take that as a joke eyy. =)

haix. enough is enough. i won`t entertain futher.

Phew!

The connection is back to normal, i supposed? I thought so.

Been craving for chocolate but didn`t want to even grab the chocolate bebeh bought for me.

It`s so big and nice and c0ol and whatnots kan? I can`t bring myself to eat it. I can just l0ok at it and imagine how it feels like to be eating this chocolate.

Haix.

On a totally different note, i shall reveal a secret i found out from myself last few days. I think i`m in love! Yes, in love. LOL. But i`m not sure. Am i in love? Yes? No? I don`t kn0w.

ARGH.

I don`t know.

Sheesh!

Dang!

Maybe not.

=X

I was so confused that i decided to make a f0ol out of myself.

Here it goes..

Laughed enough? No? Oh sorry. I don`t have any else pictures of my st00oopid faces.

"I miss mat c0ol.

I miss bebeh.

I miss sayang.

I miss darling.

I miss dear.

I miss babe."

-_-"

Once upon a time. . .

I`m so bored. So so bored.

Okay this is so random and i may sound a little bit contradicting but i`m just gonna say it. I miss my hp. Yes, i miss holding the phone (bebeh, laugh all u want). My hp has not been with me for quite some time. I decided to pass it to bebeh since i was going for holiday and though i`m back from my holidays, i don`t wish to take it back from bebeh. She even insist on meeting me near my place but i didn`t want to. Reasons being i want to spend some time alone without having to care where my hp is. However, now, i`m already missing it larr. I miss looking at the screen and just laughing out loud for no apparent reason and smiling to myself reading the sweet msges i received from the bestfrens over and over again. Oh, i miss receiving lots of missed calls from bebeh too. Hahah.

On contrary, i`m loving my life now; without hp, that is. I wouldn`t have to bother if i`ve misplaced my hp or rather if anyone try to contact me. I just love receiving calls from bebeh every now and then from the house phone. She will go,"why is it that you don`t like to answer the house phone?" (that is bcos each time she calls, i won`t be the one who answers) So, the question now is, should i get my phone back from bebeh as soon as possible or just wait till friday to have my hp back as promised?

As said earlier, i was bored. and what did i do? I edited some pics and make it look horrible than the original picture. Heh.

I`m so sorry but..this is the only picture that i could upload.

The rest, erm..it took so long to upload so i just cancelled. It`s all thanks to the internet connection problem faced by majoirty of us due to the erath quake in taiwan yesterday.

=)

SOMEONE TURNED 16 TODAY!

Thanks fad for everything.

HAHA.

Though it was for a short period of time.

It really helped, actually.

Iloveu, cousin!

I feel good BAD!

I'm finally back! Oh, how much i miss singapore. I love my country okehh. =))

It's been a very lonnnng pathethic weeks. I had to face a lot of fights and stares and most of all, i had to compromise and be the one to sacrifice a lot for the rest. Sheesh!


During that lonnnnnnnnnnng week, all i wanted was just to return to singapore and spend more time with my friends. It's just amazing that the people that i thought of most of the times was khaii and bebeh. At one point of time, i regretted for tagging the family along. I thought again, maybe i should have just followed what khaii said; not to go. However, i convinced myself that this long pathethic week will end soon..very soon.


First day was normal and i looked extra fresh and hyper. However, second day, it was very bad for me. VERY VERY BAD. The family travelled to most places in kl that i went to with bebeh a few years back. That bought a lot of memories back. I got so upset and decided to sleep in almost every journey and shut myself up. I even cried myself to sleep just because the memories kept haunting me. I even tried to remember the sweet words that khaii and bebeh used to say to me. That bad, you see! And that explains why i didn't even shop there. Shoot!


Then, the next day, we headed to genting. While we were on the way up, the head was very very giddy that i almost throw up in the car but luckily, i managed to control myself and asked some sour stuffs from the granny. When we reached, everyone was so excited to try all the rides but i didn't remember being as excited as them. I just bought the tickets but i wasn't even excited to take all the rides. Dang! The rest just had to drag me to take the rides and which in the end, i didn't even enjoy it. The mind was totally not there. It was just somewhere else and i'm not quite sure where it was. I remembered thinking of khaii, bebeh and someone else(which i know i shouldn't). Then at night, i decided to do some last minute shopping not for me but for the frens. I thought it would be a great idea to show them my appreciation for the surprise party. I bought something for fathinBEBEH, khaiiHEART, hajarSAYANG, nasDARLING and iffahDEAR. I don't know if it really suits them cos i didn't had the time to really look and choose. All i did was grab and pay. So if you guys hate it, sorry yah!


Later in the hotel, i had a short nap and surprisingly, i dreamt of someone; a girl i just knew for a months, i guess. It's just so funny larr. I mean, all this while, i thought..nehmine.. So anyway, the rest of the days was just normal. I tried my very best to show everyone my best mood cos i didn't want to spoil theirs and i think, i did quite well.


Okeh enough of that. Now, that week has just end and it's the end of the holiday and i'm back at home and i'm finally in singapore! Okay, i just crapped.


On another random note, i miss khaii and bebeh so much! It's been some time i say i love them eh? Haha. I have lotsa things to say to them but i don't know where and how to start. It's just so hard to begin and i don't know how else to mange it. It's really killing me, softly. Serious.

Anywayyyys, i made a new love on the way to kl. Nah bebeh, he's not a malaysian, he's a singaporean! My auntie even know his parents! Whee~ Oh, and i found another love at kl. Haha. We accidentally saw each other somewhere in kl and went to the same hotel. Then, when we went to genting and was queuing up for the ride, he was there too! AWW, jodoh ah konon. LOL.


Oh! Before i forget, thanks to the people who wished me on the birthday.
Let's see..
#1. Lina
#2. Khaii
#3. Bebeh
#4. Nas
#5. Shaz
#6. Acoi
#7. Naqiah
#8. Mother
#9. Kak sita
#10. Kak ita
#11. Mak Jah(mummy)
...and many more..

I just couldn't remember laaa. Sorry eh.


Let's just take a look at the wishlist once again. Shall we?

WISHLIST!
# A new bag for school

Thanks khaii!

.

.
# Supplement

Thanks bebeh!

.

.
# Improve my iman(cheh!)

# New hairdo

# Grow taller!

# Visit the airport and hospitals with loved ones( I love going there, got problem ar?)

# Laptop

# Learn swimming(LOL!)

# More vintage clothing

# Black jeans

# Get good grades

# New handphone

Thanks brother!

.

.

# Twist and shape exercise machine (LOLIPOP!)

# Hand made brownies

# More colouring books

# New blog skin (one which won't make me sick of it after a while)

# New dress (since mother wanted me to dress more like a girl)

# Warm hugs from loved ones

Thanks everyone!

.

.
# Be more confident of myself

# $$$

Thanks mother!

.

.
# ESCADA paradise perfume

Thanks bebeh!

.

.
# Sandals for school (i'm not allowed to wear slippers)

# Contact lens, maybe?

# Motivational words

# New friends

# Digicam

# A date with sparkleBABES

Thanks babes!

.

.

# A new bed (hah!)

# Be happy!

# Hersheys kisses chocolate

Thanks bebeh!

.

.

# Shades

Thanks to me!

.

.

# Any ALAF21 novels

# Converse sneakers (brown preferred)

# Kiss from ******(ssshh! you know who you are, lol)

# Mrs fields cookies!

# Meet the bestfrens on the birthday itself (if possible. =[ )

# Date with puteraPUTERI

# Date with khaii and nas, can? LOL.

Not bad eyyy.

Heh.

I'm off to have some time with bebeh.

BYE!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

PEOPLE!

What's the date today?

Go check ur calendar?

Alaa, no calendar?

Let me tell u the date, then.

It's 22 december!

And what is so special bout this date?

Think..

Quick..

Think again..

.

.

.

.

.

.

Still clueless?

It's my brithday, sweets!

Yes, my birthday.

My 17th birthday!

The day i was born.

Erm, i was born at 4+ in the afternoon, if i'm not wrong.

Heh.

I've like finally turned 17 while my frens are all turning 18 soon.

What!!

Who cares.

At least, i'm already 17.

How bout u?

Haha.

God, thank you for allowing me stay in this world for 17 years.

I`ll try my very best to bring myself closer to you and at the same time, improve my iman.

I will listen to my parent's advices and naggings as much as i can.

I won't dissapoint them or any of my family members.

In fact, i won't dissapoint myself and YOU too.

Pleasee have faith in me.

To all the people who knows me, i would like to apologise for my wrongdoings for the past years.

If i`ve hurt your feelings, upset you or misunderstood you, please accept my most sincere apology.

To the closed ones, please point out my wrongdoings from now on okay?

Bebeh, mat c0ol, sayang and the loved ones, i really hope we will stay together, forever.

Oh sheesh. This sounds like some hari raya. LOL.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Disgusted, i know.

I hate it too.

Hah!

"WE share the same situations. WE share the common goal. WE love them. WE have the same things in mind&heart. What's the difference between us? "

"YOUR suffering is visible while mine is deep inside, killing me softly. "

Ouch, that hurts.

This is in case i come back and will be a lil too late to wish; Happy 16th birthday little boy! Thank you for the "swensen's treat" last year. May god bless you and all your wishes be granted. I may now know what u've went through but all the best for your future endeavours. =))

HURT

Phew! Today's very tiring. The brother told me to go home in the afternoon so i planned to go out the auntie's house by 1. Since lina wanted to follow me home, i know i won't be feeling so lonely. While i was dressing up, bebeh called asking me to meet her but i declined cos i had other plans but she insisted on meeting so we decided to meet quite late.

When i reached home, went to my room and look on my bed.. "OMG! Is this new phone mine?" Then when i heard lina said yes, i went all excited and started fidgeting with the functions.

I took some of the remaining time to pack my bag for tmr and then, went off to meet bebeh. Where? Tamp! From tamp to my house and back to tamp again. Doink!

Mat c0ol is being so cool. Haha. No, what i meant was. He's being so sweeet-ah. (as a fren okay, nas) He said i'm a bit fierce now. Oh, he also said he's feeling so sad cos he forgot to tell me his dirty secrets. Haha. No la, just his personal stuff. No need to be upset and feel bad, at least i got to know from her rite. That's good enough, dude. Iloveubothlarr!

I've re-edited the surprise party entry again. Go read it again. GO!

Happy 2 hours till bday!

COUSINS!

Today is another great day. Finally, it stopped raining for a day. Went out with acoi, syidah and lina. Bebeh supposed to tag us along but she had to work so she didn't join us in the end.

As usual, whenever we plan to meet, acoi will be the only person who will be late. He always takes the longest time to dress up. Hah!

When he finally arrived, we decided to have our lunch since all of us were hungry. Then, we had the most difficult decision to make. "Where to eat?" Yea, we had a terrible time deciding which then we ate at KFC, finally.

After all the messed up, we went to arcade to kill some time before the movie starts. I'm very proud to say that all of us played some shooting game and i won! With that, i had to be the leader but sadly, after a few minutes of being a leader, we all lost. Hah!

By then, it was time for the movie. Okay, this is the best part. We watched NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM. It's a must must must watch movie! The movie is super duper extravaganza funny and i think u guessed it right; i laughed like a mad woman.

There's a few scenes that i can remember. One of them is when they are at the pyramid section. The guard had no choice but to wake the mummy up to seek help. The mummy could speak english and when questioned how come he could speak in english, he answered, "I studied in Cambridge University." Not funny eh? Hmm, it's funny trust me. Maybe just the way i tell it is not funny, that's why.

Another one is when the guard wanted to "fight" with one of the warriors. They shouted and ran upon seeing one another. When both of them are near each other, they started to spit out stupid words than none of them understand but in the end, that made them cry. Haha!

After the movie, the four of us had our stupid&silly jokes session. We even walked all the way from one end to another and return back to the point where we started. Haha. All thanks to the jokes larr.

The rest was normal stuff and i'm too tired to elaborate. Heh.

I have a class BBQ tmr but i don't know if i'm going or not. Something just had to happen. And i feel so bad..so sad..so upset..with myself.

PS: I've updated a lil bit of yesterday's entry, if u notice. =)

Surprise party sehh!

"It was just too prefect that yours truly nearly fainted!"

Thanks to bebeh, sayang and iffah for planning the surprise party. It was indeed very surprising that i nearly fainted larr!

It was just supposed to be an advanced bday celebration between the sparklesBABES but..it went on to another big surprise! And it's really BIG lorr!

A week ago, i msged sayang cos i wanted to meet her after school but she said she can't. I tried asking bebeh too but she said she wanted to go straight home after the paper. From there, i felt a little bit upset with them.

Since that day, everybody was acting so weird..

Last saturday, mat c0ol told me that we will meet on tuesday and i went like,"huh, why tuesday?" then he said nvm.

Yesterday, i was so excited to meet the girls. I mean..it's been a long time since i last chatted and hang out with them. Then when i was on my way to school, sayang asked me where i wanted to go cos she has no idea where to go. She also said we will just hang out at TM. All i did was just show my upset face,not to her, but to myself. Again, i went "she wanted to plan but now, she doesn't know where to go." In the afternoon, mat c0ol told me that he can't meet me on tuesday cos he's leaving for johore. I thought he won't be back by my brithday and that means, no birthday wishes. -_- Then, i received another news from nas. She told me she couldn't give me what she wanted to. So i just told her that she could give me something else. Heh!

Everything was just against me...

Today, i woke up with a very bad stomach upset. I just had to go to the toilet for more than 5 times. I even lost my hp last night!(and i finally found it on my bed this morning) LOL. It was raining elephant&rhinocerous so i didn't had the mood to go out and that explains why i went out of house late.

See what i meant? Everything just went wrong. So so wrong..

When i reached bebeh's place, we went to her room. And guess what? There was a gigantic birthday card with lotsa presents! I was so shocked, as you all know. The thing that made me cry was the content of the card. They must have put in a lot of effort to create it ehh. So anyway, the rest of the time was the gift unwrapping session and phototaking. Then i suddenly felt so hungry and told them to have my late lunch somewhere nearby. However, they kept changing the topics. Weird kann? So i just wasted my time admiring the gifts.

the BIG card and me

content of the BIG card

big card, me and the gifts

sparklesBABES

The next moment, bebeh and sayang went out of the room leaving iffah and me playing the sudoku. Next, i heard a guy's voice and knocking the door at the same time. I thought it was acap trying to find his sister so i just opened and found, mat c0ol and nas! I screamed like a man woman cos, 1. i thought khaii went to johore. 2. how come he's here? 3. i was shocked laa, for god's sake. I nearly fainted, i tell you but i didn't. I just teared cos the bestfrens are all there laaa to celebrate my birthday with me. With surprises, some more.

I tried to be tall while both of them tried to looks as short as possible

Do we look alike?

(nas, u look so cute!)

much loved

So we went to the living room to chat chat chat chat and more chat (photo taking too). Then khaii and i complained that we were hungry so i demand, yes demand, for us to go out and eat but bebeh changed the topic again. (!!!) I got so pissed that i decided to go to the toilet. Yea, no link at all. THEN! I heard the rest calling my name and after that, i saw a birthday cake and the ngee ann boys. Screamed again cos i didn't expect it to be a very big surprise. Got a shock of my life and then..everyone sang the birthday song. Oh! The way they sang it sound as if they are attending my funeral. Haha. Very evil but very sweet too. The rest of the time was camwhoring, eating, joking and laughing out loud and also story telling.

EVERYONE; minus edel

The gays GUYS

the GIRLS ; minus shariffah

There you go. A simple day which turns out to be a very big surprising day! It was great to have the loved ones celebrating the brithday. I really hope nas didn't feel left out cos she was a bit quiet than usual. I know she can be noisy larr. Heh. Anyhoos, khaii was comfortable with my frens, i hope. I could see everyone trying to make everyone else happy and that was ♥.

Let me just thank the people for their presents.
Bebeh, thank you so much for the perfume, ALAF21 novel, birthday card, EXTRA LARGE hershey kisses chocolate and ZARA shirt.(supplement too)

Khaii and nas, thanks a lot a lot a lot for the bag. I really love it and so does my mother. LOL.

Sayang, a million thanks for the slipper and brithday card. (sayang, i hope by now you know how to differentiate between a slipper and sandal ehh. hah!)

IffahDEAR, thanks for the perfume, birthday card and DOROTHY PERKINS shirt!

Nizam, thanks for the slippers.

Edel, fadhil, zur, fadzly and faisal, thanks for the ice-cream cake! Thanks to nas, i know the price. Heh!

Cik Supiah, thanks for letting us use ur house and thanks for the mee goreng!

Edel and fadhil, thank you very much for the card. It's so cute!

Many thanks to fara for the chocolates

and also to kak sita for the perfume.

After what has been planned, the planner should be appreciated right?

• To the sparklesBABES, thanks for the surprise plan and birthday card. I really love u girls! ♥
• To those who came to the surprise party, thanks for coming. It really meant a lot to me. Oh and, thanks for the white lies. Heh!
• I hope i didn't miss anyone else. *winks*

Afterall, the dissapointment and upsets does not really matters. AWWW! =)

Visual images and descriptions. Isn't it enough? Oh yes it is.

Now, i'm tired! Got a date tmr. Whee~

P.S: Fadzly, good luck with your date tmr. Heh!

Take my hand and sing with me.

"My heart sings for you.

What does your heartbeat sings for?

*

It seems awake yet it's just a dream.

Why can't i leave it that way?"

-Ramizah Ibrahim

I thought i should just post this entry on my bday but then..i'm trying my very best not to have a sad entry on that day. That's why i decided to post it today, then.

I recieved a simple but dissapointing msg from the bestfren. He said he can't meet me tmr cos he's going johore tonight. After reading the msg, i got confused. "How come he wants to meet tmr?" "When will he be back then?" He didn't even mention that he wanted to meet me tmr lorr. So i replied him trying not to sound as dissapointed as possible. He doesn't know when he'll be back from johore and that makes me more sad. Why? Maybe he won't be back till friday and that means, no birthday wish from him. It's very dissapointing, you know. However, i tried not to sound like that when i replied his msg again. This time, i even tried to end the msging so that he won't find out i was that dissapointed. Don't ever suggest for him to call/sms me from johore cos i don't want him to pay the extra money. In case you don't know, i really need his birthday wish. He's the one who keeps me awake all this while. Oh dang! =(

Not enough of that, the other fren will be going back to her hometown. Nah, her mother's hometown. Hah! She will be leaving this wednesday and that means, no wish either. Can you like imagine? The most important people in my life, will be leaving me? Even though it's not like forever, but it seems like forever la! Cos it's my birthday! =(

Bebeh, i really hope you won't go back to ur hometown or whatt eh. Don't try to leave me here all alone. I really need you, man. And where are you now? How come i called you but no one answered? Are you like avoiding me or something? Oh wait! I forgot, you were working! Haha. Forgive me babe. Nyehaha.

Haiyo. Very the saddening and the dissapointing la deyyy. How come it's like this ar? Ahaaa. Oh well, let's just update my wishlist for the last time, maybe? Alaaa, can la can laa. Tk cerewet arhhh.

Oh anyway, bebeh! Guess what? I think i seriously will get a new phone. No, not next year but this year! The brother keep asking me bout my hp and told me not to do anything with it. Nyehahaa. But, that is only a maybe larr. If not, i'll just get it next year from mother! Whee~ And guess what? Haha. Sorry la, i got lotsa stories rite. The auntie offered to buy me a laptop yesterday but..i didn't want to cos i dun want to. Yea, i'm a good kid. Jealous eh? Okay, that's a stupid joke.

UPDATED UPDATED WISHLIST!

# A new bag for school(the current one is already torn) Thanks khaii!

# Supplement Thanks bebeh!

# Improve my iman(cheh!)

# New hairdo

# Grow taller!

# Visit the airport and hospitals with loved ones( I love going there, got problem ar?)

# Laptop

# Learn swimming(LOL!)

# More vintage clothing

# Black jeans

# Get good grades

# New handphone Thanks brother & mother!(maybe, heh)

# Twist and shape exercise machine (LOLIPOP!)

# Hand made brownies

# More colouring books

# New blog skin (one which won't make me sick of it after a while)

# New dress (since mother wanted me to dress more like a girl)

# Warm hugs from loved ones

# Be more confident of myself

# $$$

# ESCADA paradise perfume Thanks bebeh!

# Sandals for school (i'm not allowed to wear slippers)
# Contact lens, maybe?
# Motivational words
# New friends
# Digicam
# A date with sparkleBABES
# A new bed (hah!)
# Be happy!
# Hersheys kisses chocolate
# Shades
# Any ALAF21 novels

..

# Converse sneakers (brown preferred)

# Kiss from ******(ssshh! you know who you are, lol) Thanks ******!

# Mrs fields cookies!

# Meet the bestfrens on the birthday itself (if possible. =[ )

# Date with puteraPUTERI

# Date with khaii and nas, can? LOL.

Since you are gone..

Yesterday as planned, went for the family day thingy and we got to watch free movie. LOL. It's a good movie anyway which really made everyone smile at the end of the show. Don't bother asking me what movie cos i forgot the title. Sheeesh. After that, the cousins and i went for our late breakfast at al-ameen and then headed to kallang since the older cousin wanted to get something for the car. While waiting for him to get his things, we watched another movie in the car. Hahah. Even after that movie ended, the cousin was not back yet so we decided to sleep since the weather was sooo cooling. When the cousin finally came back, we headed back to my house since the aunties and uncles are having their gathering again.

Later at night, we went to the new courts that was just opened. I just couldn't believe it. For the first time in my life, the uncles and aunties took more than 2 hours just to look around and buy some stuffs.

*Sometimes i admire YOU. YOU get the things YOU want and need. As for me, i only get the things that i need but sometimes, i just have to beg for it before i could get it. YOU are lucky, man. Do YOU know that? And then, i realised. That makes YOU a little bit demanding person*

**

Today, went to school to do the accounting project. Project project and project. Everyone seems to focus on the project but somehow, we couldn't get the answer. So, we decided to have our late breakfast cum lunch at business school. No, not at then canteen babe. Uyanga had a sudden craving for cup noodles so we ate together at the benches. After that, we continued doing the project again but then elenda and the rest wanted to discuss bout the BBQ thing so i decided to sleep while they yak and yak and yak. HAHA. Woke up and had this sudden craving for ice- cream so i went to the cheers which uyanga followed cos she wanted to have ice cream too. In the end, the rest bought ice cream too. LOL.

When everyone decided to go home, i called mother to accompany me go shopping for a while. While waiting for mother at the interchange, i saw a girl with her little brother. Then, 2 guys walked past her and said,"mcm mak2 siak" and laughed after that. After that, the girl's fren came and pointed to the guys earlier. The girl whom the guys claimed looked like some mother, turned and smile cheekily bitch-ily to the guys as though she wanted to seduce them. I wonder what she will say if she were to know what the guys said earlier. Hah! Okeh, so out of point. I know.

**

My heart go shalalalala!

I woke up today and realised that my face looks different. The most distinct thing is my eyes. The eyes looks freaking different lorr. I thought i cried too much resulting in that kind of eyes but i remembered that i didn't do such thing. I was laughing up the whole night talking to shazDEAR. Trust me, she got lotsa stories to tell. HAHAHA

Bebeh, u won't believe me if i say that my auntie find me a bit taller. Yes, taller bebeh! HAHA. And just today, i received a few calls from the auntie asking me bout the supplement. Nyehaha. Till now, the cousins are nudging me asking me the name of the supplement. LOL! I'm just so happy la. Tralalala~

Now, i shall announce something. I've decided that i will go for the holiday to genting. Yes, i've decided. At first, i didn't want to go because i wanted to celebrate my bday here but then, i'm leaving spore at night. So, from morning til afternoon, i can still have fun with the people who wish to celebrate it with me. If there is anyone, that is. So, to the frens out there, just ring me up if u wish to celebrate with me ehhh.

So, i decided to make my tagboard bigger back since i also can't see the words. Yes, i'm potek too. (stares at hardi and hajar) LOL. Happy, you people?

Oh dear, i need to sleep now. Catching movie tmr and it's like early in the morning. 9 in the morning. Yes, very early. But then, i'm okay with it since it's a free ticket. LOL

Toodles people!

Let's parrrtayyy!

TERM TEST ARE OVER! YAY! Overall, i find the papers manageable. I think i can pass only 3 out of 4 papers. Contradicting ey? Haha.

So anyway, ahmad bebeh and me planned to leave the LT around 4.30 cos we think we can't really answer the questions. BUT..yes, there's a but. When we were given the 10 minutes to read the papers, all the answers just came to me. No, i didn't cheat la. As in, what i studied larr. I got so excited cos i knew most of the answers. Then, when the invigilator told that we could start writing, i wrote as fast as i could cos i was afraid that the answers will just dissapear any moment. Okayy, kiasu! Then, i realised, i finished exactly when the invigilator said,"it's 4pm now. Those who have finished, can hand in their papers to me." Whoa, that's really so exact laa. I wanted to hand in my paper but when i turned back, ahmad was still doing his paper so i waited for another few minutes. A few minutes after that, he was still doing so i gave up and decided to wait for him outside. Then! Bebeh was not there too. She came out like 10 minutes after that while ahmad, came out at exactly 4.30! HAHA.

Okay, i'm like soooo drifting away from what i wanted to say. My point is, term test are freaking over la! So can enjoy la! Can go party la!

Shall i update my wishlist? Haha.

UPDATED WISHLIST!
# A new bag for school(the current one is already torn)
# Supplement
# Improve my iman(cheh!)
# New hairdo
# Grow taller!
# Visit the airport and hospitals with loved ones( I love going there, got problem ar?)
# Laptop
# Learn swimming(LOL!)
# More vintage clothing
# Black jeans
# Get good grades
# New handphone
# Twist and shape exercise machine (LOLIPOP!)
# Hand made brownies
# More colouring books
# New blog skin (one which won't make me sick of it after a while)
# New dress (since mother wanted me to dress more like a girl)
# Warm hugs from loved ones
# Be more confident of myself
# $$$
# ESCADA paradise perfume
# Sandals for school (i'm not allowed to wear slippers)

# Contact lens, maybe?

# Motivational words

# New friends

# Digicam

# Have a date with sparkleBABES

# A new bed (hah!)

# Be happy!

# Kisses chocolate

# Shades

# Any ALAF21 novels

Phew! That's like a lott larrrr but that doesn't mean i want all what. I'm just stating the things that i wish to have perrr. Anyway, no make up or dolls please. I have tons of it which i dun really makes use of. N bebeh, i dun want garfield eh. LOL!

HERE WE GO~

I wouldn't want to do this if some people don't keep asking. Anyway, this is the wishlist.

WISHLIST!

# A new bag for school(the current one is already torn)

# Supplement

# Improve my iman(cheh!)

# New hairdo

# Grow taller!

# Visit the airport and hospitals with loved ones( I love going there, got problem ar?)

# Laptop

# Learn swimming(LOL!)

# More vintage clothing

# Black jeans

# Get good grades

# New handphone

# Twist and shape exercise machine (LOLIPOP!)

# Hand made brownies

# More colouring books

# New blog skin (one which won't make me sick of it after a while)

# New dress (since mother wanted me to dress more like a girl)

# Warm hugs from loved ones

# Be more confident of myself

# $$$

# ESCADA paradise perfume

# Sandals for school (i'm not allowed to wear slippers)

...to be continued =)

Voting time!

It's so hard to decide. The aunty and her family has been pestering me to go with them for the holiday. Part of me wants to go but part of me just wish that i can spend my birthday here, in singapore. However, if i were to celebrate it here in singapore, the mother will be busy working. The brothers will be out with their frens. So, i think celebrating it during the holiday will be fun too. I wish i could have the answer to all this. Could you guys just help me with it? Thanks.

Just click it!

Should i go for holiday from 22 till 27 dec? Yes! No! Search The Internet

Due to popular demand(from most of the frens), WISHLIST will be up soon! =)

Contradicting laaaaaa.

Ku lelah dengan semua yg ada, ingin ku lepas semua...

It's been pretty messed up this few days.

I think i screwed up most of the papers.

All that i've studied was such a waste.

I know the answers to the questions but..my hand wrote the wrong thing.

What's going on?

It's getting complicated than ever.

I thought with the people whom i trust the most helping me out, it could actually lighten a bit of the load..

but i was wrong.

She just makes it more complicated.

So now, should i or shoud i not continue with what i'm doing?

That time i asked if what i'm doing is right.

N you said, yes cos it's the most sensible thing to do.

Now, you said i shouldn't have even give in at first.

Contradicting, aren't you?

****

I don't wish to continue.

Enough enough enough enough.

'_'

Oh. Maybe i should just smile cos i got to see **** yesterday.

Yes, in the canteen once and he was in the same room as me for QUAN test.

Nyehaha.

Ok stop.

=X

Misses. Hugs. Kisses.

Sitting in the bus alone while listening to the new uploaded songs put into the mp4..Somehow it makes me think. The mp4 has been with my for a few months and i've share it with a few people. That made me realise how much i miss those people.

1) I miss the pakistan-hindustan guy, sh****. I miss his voice, his blur look and his kental moves. LOL. Of course, i miss his silly jokes too. Hah!

2) I miss **ck fikri. Too perfect for my choice. Kau amat sempurna buatku laa! hEH. During that few months, you made me realise how much i've went thru. How hard i've tortured myself. But then, we drifted away cos..i don't know what reasons. So near but yet so far.

3) I miss mat siput babi. Another guy that was introduced by my sayang. A very sweet and simple guy. I still remember the time when i went for holidays. He knew that i did not bring my hp along but he msged me every single day wishing me good morning and etc. AWW.

4) I miss khaii. The bestfrenlaa! I just realised that i haven't set the date for us to go out since i've cancelled our last meeting last 2 months. Sheesh!

Oh. I'm missing lots and lots of people. Dang! I feel a bit lonely when they are not around. Haix. Okeh! Enough enough enough!

Anyway, OOPG paper just now was okay but since i did not understand a single thing that was taught( which i did to read n understand yesterday), i think i'll do badly. Like someone said, "all the worst ehh." At least, i'm glad that i could take the paper. I reached the LT 5 minutes before the paper started and it's all thanks to the traffic jam. Dang!

Tomorrow's QUAN. I did some revision in the afternoon and now, i'm getting bored of the numbers that i see. Hah! Shall continue it later.

I want to thank shazDEAR for accompanying me till wee hours while i study. Thanks for being a listening ear too! I love u dear! =)

Study.

Tomorrow's term test! Yea, u heard me rite! Tomorrow is term test. Besok ader ujian penggal .(thanks little boy!) Went to study at bebeh's house. Yes, i did study for a bit but bebeh did not, okeh! Initially she had the intention to study but when she got hold of her lappy, she decided to went on doing other things. So naughty!

Before that, met nizam to pass his belated bday stuff. Bebeh sayang zur and me didn't get the chance to wish him on his bday so we decided to do our own bday card and get him a boxer. LOL. "NERD POWER"; inside joke. HAH!

the card that we made esp for him!

After studying for a few hours, met sayang at p.ris int to have our dinner. At the same time, catching up with our lifestories. Hah. Snapped some pictures with bebeh's new phone while we made fun of each other.

The weird thing was that bebeh was being so blur and i think it's so freaking funny cos it's unlike her to be that way. We were talking bout some gathering while she interrupted and mentioned bout me going for genting. Another one was that we were talking bout the bday celebration when she talked bout her pay. So out of point lah bebeh. Hah! And one thing that made me laugh real loud at macdonald's was when she made a joke out of sayang's sengetness. Okay, inside joke again.

Need to study again. Toodles!

Everyone.

No, i shall not make everyone confuse.

Those people reading my humble blog.

I will be putting up the password prompt soon.

For safety purposes. HAHA.

So, i'm really sorry if u dun get to read the entries.

When it all falls apaart.

It's been three pathethic and scary months.
And yet i'm still facing the incident.
Each time i try to forget it, another thing will just happen.
N that makes me think?
Why me?
Why a whole lot of times?
N when i questioned that someone, he answered, "it's the attention."
Byk kaoo nyer attention!

And so, i lied.
I lied to the people i talk to almost everyday.
Not because i like it a lot.
It's because i just dun want them to know what's going on.
N what i'm feeling inside.
I know they will be dissapointed, worried and etc.
Sheeesh!
I feel so bad.
It's been so bad that i can't concentrate in anything that i do.
I'm confused with my feelings.
I confused myself with everything.
I don't know where i'm heading to.
What's the truth, actually?

To my sayang, err, i really need to say something to you?
N u better be frank with me.
If not, BOF ehh!
I want u to be frank with me cos i know it's only between the both of us.
It's for ur own good.
For my sake, please.

To that little boy, i'm sorry but i lied yesterday. It's not that incident which bothers me but something else. Oh, but i didn't lie bout the incident thing. It really is bothering me till now.

SHAZ! My hp is okayy already. Now, you can msg me all u want. We can have our whining session back tauu. =))

School has been great for me. I've been attending most lectures nowadays and that is good lorr. Saw **** in LT yesterday and most of the people in the class kept telling me that he was there. As if i couldn't see. Hah.

Term test is like next week but i have yet to touch the books. I mean, i've studied some topics for CORE but not for OOPG and the rest. Oh! I've not done the service reflection again. Yes, again! I did it last week at work but the file just went missing when i went for break and off the lappy. Dang!

I had some serious talk with bebeh just now during lecture. I spilled all my secrets. Haha. I felt so nervous cos she can be really strict, you know. However, she didn't really scold but just say out her views. Thanks bebeh! I love you.

I have another "assignment" which is due tmr. 12am, to be exacrt. I'll try my very best to complete it unless i want to face the music. N what is it? Maintain that thing for a year. Like whhhhat? A year. There's no way..

LOL!

Yesterday after work, went to vivocity(!!!) with the cousins. It was a last minute plan so, though. We decided to dine at swensens since it's been quite sometime we did that.

Mizahh: I'll go with my normal food ehh.
The rest: Ya ya.
Mizahh: Okay, i'll call the waiter now.
*suddenl, the lights all went off*
Mizahh: Uh-oh. Blackout ey? Haha. Funny sia.
The rest: HAHA. Can you believe it? I think they didn't pay the bills.

It doesn't really end there. The rest of the customers started to sang bday songs and the cousins joined them. As for me, i entertained the bestfren for a short while before he decided to go.

So, we waited for almost an hour for the lights to be on back. Then, waited for the food to reach for another half an hour. Ate for bout, say, 1 hour afterwhich we realise it's already 9. LOL. OH! Have i mentioned? The waited that served us was..kentally-cute? Heh. The was he talks, smile and walk is exactly the same like khairul anuar. Even his face was the same too. No, not the best fren but the anugerah finalist. Haha. I was like, "eh, cam kenal ar. saper eh?" The cousin who dun really fancy that anugerah finalist even said the same thing. Too bad i didn't snap a picture with him. Hehe. AWW.

After that, we made our way to some of the shops and while walking, i think i saw fad and syasya. They were at burger king, i guess. I'm not really sure it was them cos i was going down the escalator.

"You made believe that you were sincere while actually it wasn't even your plan in the first place."

Breakable thread.

I would like to aplogise to shaz n khaii for not replying their msgs. My hp was showing me somekind of attitude yesterday that i couldn't reply the msgs. I'll just chat with you guys when i'm online.

Oh! To mat c0ol, i really have something to say. Erk, it seems that u're busy with everything now. Just contact me if u're rotting at home, kays. That way, we can entertain each other better. =)

"All this time you were pretending,so much for my happy ending.It's nice to know that you were there"

Terribly sorry.

First of all, sorry for the inconvenience caused. I didn't intend to put a password to access to the blog but something happened and i think the blog is the only place i could vent everything out. After that, i realised those people reading the blog will have a certain impressions on the person that i wrote bout. That's the reason why i came up with the password thing. Now, since the situation has come back to normal and since both of us has make up with each other, no more password to access to this blog. To those people who keep whining for the password, are you guys happy now?

Anyway, back to normal business. Where did i stop? Oh yeah, yesterday i had 2 hours break before QA lecture. Spent most of the time at library with the guys reading up while waiting for bebeh to finish her lesson. Surprisingly, she end quite early than usual. Met her while i was on the way to the LT. She dragged me to follow her and the rest to business school cos they wanted to buy the machine's sandwich. Which then, i had a sudden craving for ice-cream. I told them to go to cheers since they are selling ben & jerry's ice cream. On the way, i was so engrossed talking to ahmad that i didn't realise the people walking in front of me. Then, bebeh who was talking to the rest of the girls came up to me and said, "oi! tk nmpk fad eh? "
"fad maner pulak? "
"fad maner lagik yg kau kenal? "
Then i thought and finally remembered that the cousin had told me that she wanted to attend some event that was held by the school. Ahaa.

After the lecture, went to TM with bebeh and this time, we stayed till like..err 10+. No, i left early while bebeh stayed with her family. Then, at the bus interchange, something scray happened. It's like after that 2 months incident, the same thing keep happening to me. I just can't understand why it have to happen a lot of times. Sheesh!

ERK! Suddenly, i'm so busy entertaining some people. I'll be back soon kays! =)